There Are No Strangers Here

At my Yorkshire retreat a couple of weeks ago, one of those attending was a customer called Heather. Heather had flown in from the US and although I had never met her before in person, I already felt I knew her so well thanks to her being part of the group who had trialled our community platform, The Maker’s Space, at the end of last year. At the end of the second day of the retreat though, as I was just sat on the sofa with some of the other retreat attendees, Heather walked down the stairs and behind her came Susanne.

For background, Susanne was another member of our trial group for The Maker’s Space, another person I hadn’t actually met before in real life but knew immediately (and, importantly for context, someone who hadn’t been at the retreat). She had driven across to my family home, to meet Heather and present me with one of the best gifts I have ever received, something so incredibly meaningful – a wall-hanging stitched by our community from The Maker’s Space.

This piece was created by 14 stitchers, from both sides of the Atlantic, who came together without me knowing to make a piece for me not only as a thank you for the work poured into The Maker’s Space but also to create a reminder for me of the power of what I can do for others. I want to share in their words, why they chose to make this – not because I want to show off, but because this has meant the world to me.

Here is what was in the card, written by Camille and designed by Heather:

There are so many things I could say about this piece, but I want to focus on three key things the generosity of these women has taught me.

If we take the example of why these women have all met, the idea to create The Maker’s Space, this was a hugely scary decision for us to make as a business. I wanted to create an environment where what happens in my in-person workshops — where a group of strangers come together, face their creative fears and support one another through them — but make it possible for far more people. So no matter where you are in the world, no matter how supportive your family or friends are, there is a creative network of people to give you confidence. Because I truly believe creative confidence is life-changing – it brings you self-worth, it gives days, weeks, months a sense of purpose, it shows you what you are capable of.

Maybe it sounds like I am being overdramatic, for I guess what could be in its essence considered a virtual sewing group. To I am sure outsiders, or people who haven’t experienced the life changing power of creativity, it could seem silly. Me and Meg in my team poured hours, days, months into creating The Maker's Space. It was spreadsheets and systems and stress, but all of it worth it the moment we saw people actually connecting — truly connecting.

There were people who hadn’t stitched in years suddenly finishing pieces of their own design. People who lived alone who now had weekly group chats with others who just "got it." People who, in their own words, found themselves again through thread and fabric. There is nothing small about that.

It reminded me that every single thing we do at The Fabled Thread, every kit, every story, every workshop, isn’t just about teaching someone to embroider. To some it may be just a hobby project, a nice thing to do with your hands on a Sunday afternoon. But to others? It’s a lifeline. It’s what gets them through grief. It’s what helps them reclaim a sense of self after becoming a parent or going through a breakup or battling anxiety. It’s the one thing they do in a day that’s entirely for themselves.

So if you ever think what you’re doing is too niche, too small, too insignificant – stop. The impact of making someone feel seen, connected and capable? It’s enormous.

A couple of weeks before receiving this wall-hanging I had attended an networking event, and to be brutally honest, had left feeling a little disheartened. Whilst I was in a room full of entrepreneurs, I myself felt really out of place. The very nature of running a needlework kits business means most people's first reaction is to not take you seriously. It’s a hobby business surely, it’s a “nice” business, it’s not going anywhere though is it.

When I am in that environment, I find myself being a bit like the one left on a bench at a school disco waiting to be asked to dance – I am not of immediate relevance to other people. Rather than embracing that as one of our superpowers (the fact people underestimate how incredible the crafting market is and how well these businesses can do is their failing, not mine), my ego wants approval. The ex-banker in me wants to feel relevant. So then I start playing up – feeling like I have to justify to people who I really don’t need to, why we are great, why they should be interested in what I am building, why I am worth talking to also.

Then, as I am sure lots of you can relate to if ever in one of those insecure networking environments, you start becoming a person you are not. You behave differently, try to prove yourself – so you leave the event just feeling a bit down. Can’t work out why you pretended to be something, not just be yourself.

But you know what – how many of those businesses who are doing seemingly great things, have had their customers go to the length my customers, my community, go to for me. How many businesses actually impact people's lives in a way where they pour hours into giving something back to the business? We aren’t a charity, we are a business – so this is something quite remarkable. The care, attention, devotion and love shown by the people that actually matter to the business is worth 1,000 networking opportunities in a room of strangers. Because it shows where we are going, what I am trying to do is different, and it’s special – not everyone will get it.

So this wall-hanging does exactly what Camille wrote in her card for me – it is something to look on at moments of doubt, fear, insecurity and remember to have courage.

And truthfully, I really needed that reminder. At that moment in time, I was carrying so many of the quiet self-doubts that often sit behind a confident exterior. Because yes, on the surface I might look self-assured – I’m running a business, standing in front of people, talking to the camera, launching new ideas. But so many of us are walking around with our own internal confidence battles, aren’t we? The constant second-guessing, the questioning of whether you’re doing enough, being enough, making the right calls. This wall-hanging arrived like a hand on the shoulder saying, "You’re doing okay. Keep going." And honestly, I don’t think I realised just how much I needed someone to say that until these women did.

To create means to build something from nothing – none of what exists today – our studio, our team, our kits in your homes – existed five years ago. But every single aspect of what I have built has been the outcome of decisions – from the big decision to leave my job, or make my first hire, or take on a studio space, to the seemingly smaller decisions of whether to add more designs to the musicians range or which supplier to use for our frames.

But nothing is told to you, and no one makes the decision for you – at times the sheer volume of decisions on my shoulders is completely overwhelming and, even with a family and team that couldn’t be more supportive, the life of a founder can feel incredibly lonely. The weight of bad decisions will always weigh heavier just as the weight of a negative comment will also stay with you longer. Having control over what you are building and your future is equal measures exhilarating and exhausting.

Despite the fact that in the end The Maker’s Space wasn’t something we were ready as a business to launch, and that after a 3-month trial we ended up disbanding it (which I wrote about at length here) – which to some extent, after all the work that went into it, could feel like a failure – what it did was show us a better path, a more sustainable way, until we are big enough as a business to do The Maker’s Space without burning ourselves out.

However there was not one moment when any of the 100 people who took part in it were annoyed that this platform that I had created for them was being taken away – every single person understood the decision we were taking, supported the decision and reassured me – every single person was kind and knew I had been trying.

When those once-in-a-blue-moon, negative comments come my way and it can knock me sideways – make me want to crawl back into my hole and actually just not try anything new anymore – I must remember that the vast vast majority of people out there see you exactly as you are. Someone trying to do their best, someone taking immense personal risk, and someone to support not chastise.

There is a quote that Heather included on the back of the card:
“There are no strangers here; only friends you haven’t met.”

Whilst in the end we didn’t go ahead with The Makers Space, this group of women from all over the world have made their own group, kept in touch and continue to support one another. If I hadn’t taken the risk in the first place, or poured so much heart and soul in, that would never have happened.

You can take all the business milestones, the LinkedIn-style highlights, but nothing has ever felt like such an achievement as receiving this.

But this wall-hanging isn’t just a thank you. It’s a challenge. A quiet but powerful nudge to keep going. To live up to the best parts of yourself, even when it would be easier not to. To stay generous, curious, wholehearted. Because if that’s how people see me, then I’d better be brave enough to keep showing up that way.

And more than just reflecting who I am, these words are a reminder of who I want to keep being.

Honesty — especially in a world that sometimes feels ready to tear you down the moment you make a mistake. To write about it, to tell others the truth, to explain yourself.

Generosity — to keep giving and you're pouring your heart into something with no guarantee it will “pay off” in the traditional business sense.

Courage — to take decisions that feel risky or unconventional, especially when they don’t align with how others define or see success.

Integrity — to stay anchored in purpose, even if it means being the outlier in the room or like the one left without anyone to dance with.

Steadfastness — to keep going, especially when things feel slow or stuck or shaky, because your team, your customers, you community are relying on you even if you don’t always realise it

Curiosity — to keep asking questions, to not feel a need to copy, to follow trends or so what others are doing. To exploring possibilities, rather than defaulting to what’s known,

Humility — to remember that you’ll never have it all figured out, and that’s okay. You’re going to make mistakes but that’s often the only way to learn

And, all importantly, the joy in it all. At the end of the day, to get to do what I do everyday, work with the people I work with, create products that bring happiness, to have customers that appreciate it, and a family that couldn’t be more supportive of it. There’s a lot of joy in that! These are values to live up to — especially on the hard days, when those things feel furthest from reach.

So finally, to Victoria, Heather, Lauren, Norine, Amy H, Emily, Fiona, Janet, Grace, Sophie, Susanne, Amy M, Carol, Miriam, and Camille – thank you. Truly. Your words, your stitching, your kindness – they have left a mark on me I won’t ever forget.

I leave you with a picture of each of their work!